Monday, April 4, 2016

Forgiving My Daughter's Killer by Kate Grosmaire

Forgiving My Daughter's Killer by Kate Grosmaire is quite possibly the hardest book that you will ever read.  BUT if you want to read a humbling book about grace and forgiveness this is that book.  Kate and Andy are very close to this young man, Conor, though they do not want their daughter to marry him.  It is not that they expected him to kill their daughter, they don't even suspect that there is any violence in their relationship.  In fact when they first hear that their daughter, Ann, has been shot their first thought is, " where is Conor?"  Conor while facing some difficulty with his own parents had even lived with them for a short while.  But just a little while into finding out that Conor is who shot their daughter who is now clinging to life on a ventilator both Kate and Andy decide separately to forgive him.  This book not only tells the process that each of them went through to get to this point but also what they did after to help Conor through the wheels of justice and offer him restorative justice.  Restorative justice not just in their heart but working with the justice system and being the first capital murder case to offer restorative justice in Tallahassee.  Conor placed Kate as one of the only 4 people that could visit him in jail even though that meant that if she never visited him he could not replace her for a month.  Conor's parents though they had never met the Grosmaires immediately came to the hospital room to offer whatever help they could.  This began the process of the two families working together to help Conor through the justice process.

This book is most definitely a difficult read.  I had to stop numerous times during the first 4 chapters to stop crying.  This book does not portray any of the characters as perfect.  No one would ever confuse this book with fiction.  This book tells in a loving way how Kate and her husband, Andy, lived through and came out on the other side of their youngest daughter's horrible murder and decided to forgive him.  Now I don't mean forgive and forget they will never forget Ann and what she meant to them I mean forgive him and want good for him.  They still wanted him punished but didn't want him to spend the rest of his life in prison--rather they wanted him to complete a shorter stint in prison and then do community work in things that mattered to Ann.
There are probably children out there who could read this book and get some good out of it but let me be the first to say this is an adult book with hard difficult matters to discuss on murder and the justice system.  I am so glad that I read it but you must be prepared for it especially if you have children of dating age.  I would most definitely say read it but just be prepared this is not a pretty subject and though the author is very loving in the handling of the subject some things you just can't pretty up and murder by shotgun is one of them.
I received this book from Booksneeze for this review.

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